CRPS & Fibromyalgia Potential Tragic Effects

I was diagnosed with Complex Regional Pain Syndrome (CRPS) in 2011, as a result of a severe injury. One symptom of this infirmity is chronic pain. In my life, suffering with chronic pain is by far the worst I have been through physically. Initially, I thought I was going to die. The affects of chronic pain began in my right lower extremities and quickly spread throughout my entire body. The reality of it is quite numbing.

I began feeling muscle spasms, pricking pins and needles, nagging and stab-like pain, stiffness, sensitivity to touch, smell, weather, and sounds in which all are unbearable. Then shortly after, I learned that having CRPS triggered severe fibromyalgia. Just when I am feeling the pain from CRPS, here comes fibromyalgia, another monster ailment that causes more pain. This pain is persistent in my neck, hips, thighs, knees and back.

Chronic fatigue, another derivative of CRPS causes me constant exhaustion. It does not matter what position I am in while in bed, I cannot sleep. Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) snuck in without warning forcing me to take frequent restroom breaks. This ailment imposes other symptoms such as sensitivity to touch, smell, and sounds. Additional tragic effects of CRPS and fibromyalgia that I deal with are depression, stress, isolation, and recluse-like behavior, paranoia, and more.

I mean you name it as anything that came with devastation and turning my life upside down became my daily way of life. At times I feel inadequate, incapable, not the same, not belonging, and a “nobody.” Day after day, and year after year, I feel like I am not the same person prior to becoming disabled. I am amazed at how something so devastating could happen to me but finally realized that I am not exempt.

Just when I thought that I knew all of what I was dealing with in having CRPS and fibromyalgia, I learned that they cause chronic inflammation. In addition to that, chronic inflammation causes an increase in iron storage (Ferritin) and cholesterol. Of course this is truly overwhelming. I would not wish any of my ailments on my worst enemy.

I realized that I had to rely on my spirituality and my connection to God to make it through. Over time dealing with 20 plus doctors including specialists having a say in my health provides so much additional stress. This hard pressed stress is unshakable. Some of these professionals are on my side, and some of them are not. Currently, I am still dealing with doctors that do not know me but have a say in my treatment. These doctors are hired to deny me. This is what I believe as I cannot see why anyone would deny my much needed treatment.

This is the game that I am forced to be a part of when all I want is to get better. I want to feel better about myself, and have a life somewhat close to what I once knew. What helps me get through is #1 my faith in God, and #2 my son. Both are my caregivers and they support me to the fullest. I believe that God uses my son to help with everything I need. I salute all caregivers out there making it happen and providing for their loved ones. I attribute a new outlook for my life largely to those two subjects.

This year will make 10 years of enduring chronic pain. I deal with many symptoms each day since the onset and have been for about 3,650 days now. Imagine that. You folks that do not have to deal with such infirmities are lucky. I know there are doubters out there saying “no” it’s impossible for anyone to have so much pain. Well, I beg to differ. I tell you doubters that you cannot possibly understand what I am dealing with as you are not me.

If you do not suffer chronic pain or the above-mentioned ailments, then I would not expect you to understand. I just hope you will not have to endure what I deal with or anything remotely close to it. I would like for you to have compassion for anyone dealing with such infirmities, and offer a little empathy.

Having CRPS and fibromyalgia has opened my eyes to having more compassion for people with disabilities. I do encounter folks that hate to see people like me coming. I cannot help that I use crutches to ambulate or use my scooter in congested areas and on concrete flooring. Although I have always felt compassion for people with disabilities, I did not feel some negativity until I became disabled.

Some people can be outright cruel, and it does not matter where I encounter them. I have experienced them in public stores, or at professional places such as doctors and law offices. I eventually came to terms with what I am dealing with and began exploring ways of getting through life as best I can.

I have discovered that I do not have to wallow in my disabilities. I realized that chronic pain and all other symptoms that I feel can consume me if I allow them to. I have wasted enough time with them getting the best of me. Life is short and way to precious for me to stay in bed and focus on pain permeating throughout my body. I absolutely must “Deal” with it. I have decided to distract myself with growing in my faith and loving those most dear to me.

In generalizing about folks with chronic pain, I thought all pain was the same. Since having chronic pain with CRPS and fibromyalgia, I learned that pain is different for everyone. My pain is more severe than I could have thought before. However, I also learned that I have the power to change my outlook about it and not let it consume me.

Now I will apply a new viewpoint for my life in 2021 and look to motivate myself and others. I will cherish the time with those that love and care about me. I will not turn them away due to dealing with my infirmities but will embrace my time with them. We will talk on interesting topics, play board games, or just enjoy each others presence.

I believe my life’s purpose is to spread love and motivate others, and this is what I am doing. I want to let people with disabilities know that they do not have to allow their infirmities control them. Do not lay around feeling sorry for yourself as if you do then you will eventually waste away. Precious time with family and friends will be lost, and when that time passes it cannot be recovered.

I want to give my best to those that love me. I believe now that I am doing just that. Therefore, I will not allow CRPS and fibromyalgia to impose tragic effects on my life but instead, Motivate, Motivate, and Motivate.

Stay up, Stay Mobile, and Stay Motivated!

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What are your thoughts on pain in general?